Coming Out
Mar 1st 2008PostmasterSurvivorship & Working Life & Uncategorized
So Henry is Doug. You have seen several posts under the name “Henry” (which is my middle name) talking about a recurrence of my cancer and my treatment with salvage radiation therapy. I haven’t been posting as much as I would have liked because I was focused on finishing my treatment and also on updating my soon-to-be-published book. Recurrence can add a whole new dimension to the cancer journey, to say the least.
What is most telling, though, is that I felt the need to mask my identity. I am a professional with a job, a family to support and responsibilities. Coping with cancer on top of all of this is hard enough, but I was frankly worried about how a recurrence could impact my career now and in the future. It is unfortunately true that many people, upon hearing that you have cancer, automatically think of you as sick and dying. Yes, it can impact your work while you are being treated and while you are dealing with the emotional shock of a diagnosis but, for the vast majority of us, we can very quickly get back to work. We may have to do it part-time for awhile, particularly if our jobs are physical, but we can still work.
The cancer survivors that I know are some of the strongest people I have ever met. If you can handle a major life crisis like cancer and survive, I would argue that you can handle just about anything. That’s certainly how I feel about myself and how I think about anyone with cancer. I wish everyone thought that.
In my case, both with my initial diagnosis and also with my recent recurrence, I have been pleasantly surprised at the response. Telling people at work hasn’t hurt me at all and I am infinitely thankful for the support I have received. I wish everyone was so understanding.
I am a survivor and I am strong.
Posted by Doug
When we are stricken with cancer, depending on which cancer, its stage, etc., we are faced with many choices. Choices of doctor, choices of treatment, choices to get second (or third or fourth) opinions. They are all terribly important choices that we have to make at a time when our lives have been turned upside down, and each of us will approach these choices in a way that is uniquely us. Many people are very analytical and will vacuum up as much information as possible in order to make the “right” choice. Others feel much more comfortable putting their faith in their doctor(s) because they don’t feel qualified to make some of these choices on their own. I think others may just get dragged along, hoping for the best.