I remember my Aunt Joyce vividly. She died of the same cancer I had 2 years after her diagnosis. I thought that her fate was my fate when I was diagnosed. But time? and science? has made my experience with cancer different from hers and her family. I remember her with fond memories, not sadness.

My mom died of cancer too. At first I was frightened that I would never remember her - her voice - her hug - her smile. And it was so painful to think about those things and the fact that she was gone. But now I think of the good memories. Her silly-ness, her laugh, her love for all of us. When my brothers and I get together we fall into a repeating conversation: remember when Mom….., hahahahaha, and when you did ___ and Mom was so mad! (Which was interesting in itself because my mother never raised her voice. All it took was a frown to express to us that she was unhappy because she was rarely unhappy. Then we felt terribly guilty.)

You could say that cancer takes people we love away from us. But as the saying goes, no-one gets out of here alive! But nothing - not even cancer - can take away the good stuff. The fun, the frivolity, the laughter and the closeness that we have felt with the ones we love.

I try to take one day at a time. And I thank cancer for helping me to do that and to appreciate the here and now and sort through the garbage I can ignore. And know that time spent with loved ones and family is precious.