Pushing The Edge
Sep 1st 2007PostmasterFresh Starts
Pushing the edge reminds me of how I felt at the end of my long ordeal on chemotherapy. I had no hair, few white blood cells, very low iron stores and one less boob. I was at the edge of life. I don’t think that my body would have tolerated another bout of chemo. There had already been numerous treatment complications such as fevers with low blood counts and various infections that could have done me in.But a year later I had hair, lots of white blood cells and plenty of iron. My color returned to normal and I had my energy back full force. I was absolutely amazed at my body’s ability to recuperate from such harsh treatment.
Since my cancer diagnosis, I have taken up running. I’ve given up my couch potato lifestyle and joined those crazy runners/joggers that you see pounding the pavement in all kinds of weather. I’m in my runners 3-4 times each and every week.
I have rarely had the enthusiasm for anything “sport-like” so I am frankly surprised that I have been so persistent in this activity. I was a fat kid and pretty clumsy. But I have been pushing the edge of my abilities since I began 3 years ago.
It occurred to me today that I push myself to run longer and faster just so I can see what else this old body can amaze me with. Another part of me runs because it feels so good to do it. And if I’m really honest with myself, I bet I’m really trying to run away from the demon that lives inside me that is called recurrence.
How do you try to push the edge? What are you running away from?
Let’s talk.
Posted by Ruth
1 Comment »
Russ McGowan on 08 Sep 2007 at 9:04 pm #
Hi Ruth. Thank you for your involvement in the talkingaboutcancer.com website. We can all benefit from your experience in having been diagnosed over 7 years ago, and where you are now in your life.
One of your articles on this site is called “miles and miles of milestones” and that pretty much sums things up. As every long-distance runner knows, you start small and build slowly over a long period of time. Next thing you know, you are running a mile, then a 5k, then 10k, and next thing you know you are considering what at one time would have seemed an impossibility, a half-marathon.
Though I am fortunate in my good health, I really identify with your running, having experienced going from worrying I was having a heart attack after 5 minutes of running, to training for and successfully running multiple marathons.
It is truly amazing what the human body can do, and what is even more amazing is what a positive attitude can do in dealing with and recovering from cancer.
It is truly uplifting to see how many milestones you have successfully passed in the 7 years since your initial diagnosis.
Thank you for sharing your experiences.
Russ McGowan
September 2007